What Birth Parents Can Expect After Delivery
Adoption planning typically focuses on the weeks and days leading up to the delivery of the baby, but what can a birthmother expect after the big moment? With so much attention placed on finding an adoptive family whose values align with the birthmother’s, and then cultivating a relationship with that family during the pregnancy, life for the birth mother after delivery is more often an afterthought. This article will identify and answer some common questions a birthmother may have.
Can I see/hold my baby at the hospital?
The birthmother is in control of outlining the hospital plan, so the decision to see and/or hold the baby is entirely up to her. No two adoptions are the same, so the answer to this question depends upon the preference and comfort level of the birthmother and what she feels is best for her and for the baby. She may wish for the adoptive family to hold the baby first, or she can choose to spend time with the baby alone after delivery.
What happens if the baby has health problems?
Most babies are born healthy and happy. There may be times when this is not the case. Even with good prenatal care, health issues may not be picked up on during routine tests and scans, and conditions may be discovered at birth. In that rare occurrence, many adoptive families are receptive to adopting a child with a medical condition. If this is not the case, our agency will present more suitable matches to the birthmother to ensure the baby will be raised in a loving and nurturing home.
Can I contact the baby and the adoptive family after the adoption is finalized?
The answer to this question will vary depending on the type of adoption the birthmother has chosen. If a birthmother has decided she would like an open or semi-open adoption, then the answer is yes. There may be some specifications or prerequisites that the birthmother and adoptive family discuss that outline the degree and method of contact that the birthmother has with the child. If an open or semi-open adoption has been discussed and agreed upon, it is important for the development and benefit of the child to uphold regular contact. In the instance of a closed adoption, there is no communication after the adoption is finalized.
Remember: don’t be afraid to ask!
As a birthmother, or as birth parents, you have the right to ask as many questions as you feel are necessary in order to make the best decision and plan for the baby. You should feel comfortable with the adoption process and be able to refine the details of your adoption plan. You can select the perfect adoptive family, and prepare for life after adoption.